“never met an argument you couldn’t drive a big ol’ mack truck through”
I am really happy and pissed off.
I had an awesome weekend with my boys. Our show kicked ass. Special ass, not just your everyday ass-kicking. We’ve got three regular venues, gay bars, that we play in three different cities around here. Well, we played a show at a new venue Saturday. A straight bar; pool hall with special bike parking and shit. We were all nervous. Playing a new venue means you don’t know how it’s going to be accepted. Playing a straight bar was taking a big chance – considering half the people in the gay scene here have never heard of drag kings, our show was certain to be something the straight community had never seen, or probably even imagined. None of us knew much about the place, it wasn’t anywhere we’d been before (like, just to chill even, not just for a show). But it kind of pissed me off how bad everyone was freaked out (myself included, though i really was rather less concerned than most of the rest of the troupe). Yes, i do understand being kind of worried dressed in drag at a strange, kind of sketchy-looking straight bar. But. We just can’t be walking in there hoping to be accepted (and, really, hoping to be really liked) while we are jumping to judgments about the people there. It took me a little while to figure out that that was what was going on, but once i did it made me mad at us.
And. It went fucking amazingly! For one thing, we put on a hell of a show. One of our friends who came said it was the best she’d seen. I think, once we drowned the detrimental exess of it in alcohol, the nervousness helped; it made us work. When the DJ announced our show starting, he said something along the lines of “here’s something i’ve never even heard of!” It was totally fucking novel, and that translated to fucking entertaining. Everything about it was great, so i’ll stop gushing on the details. The owner said we could come back any time we want – so we have a new venue, and we’ve done something kind of historic (at least in this area). Thrilled!
Back to people pissing me off, though. Trait one – hypocrisy. Now, trait two – superiority. Me and Jake went to breakfast last week. She asked me if me and Erin had a “status,” which we don’t. But we got to talking about her, and Jake says, “well, she’s not as dumb as A.” I wanted to slap her. I just gave her a kind of dirty look. I know that Jake, as my gay boyfriend put it recently, “has an intelligence fetish” (which does do well for my self-esteem, but…) I didn’t quite know how to respond about Erin, because i don’t actually know her well enough to say too much on the issue, but more so because i didn’t want to look like “defensive ’cause i like her” – particularly since that was my immediate reaction. So i pretended she hadn’t said that part; i stuck with A. Who, Jake’s right, ain’t the brightest (this is, in fact, one of the reasons i never liked her like that). But. A is the only person i know who will stop you in the middle of a conversation and ask “what’s that word mean?” or “i don’t know what that is?” That is a pretty amazing trait. (And, though i didn’t say this part, something Jake does not have the balls to do because she’s afraid she might not look like the smartest person around. I lean that way myself, to be fair to her.) It’s that kind of questioning that keeps “not so smart” from being “anti-intellectual,” which does piss me off.
Since then, i’ve given it more thought. What i said about A was spot on, because i had really thought that through a bit before. But, Erin. Well, as i said, i don’t know her well enough to really argue the point, but she’s certainly not dumb. And she’s well educated – more so than Jake, notably (though Erin’s older than us, and so had more time to get there). Really, what Jake was saying is that she’s not (despite multiple advanced degrees) an academic or an intellectual. True. What pisses me off is the assumption that because Erin is all about her boat or her dog or her bike or her car or ’cause she plays sports – because she’s ordinary (simple, perhaps) – she can’t be smart. I hate that kind of over-intellectual superiority bullshit.
While i’m on a roll, let’s throw this post by Essin’ Em onto the list of things/people that have pissed me off recently. Not, to clarify, Essin’ Em herself, but the same thing she’s pissed off about – her being told “I think you’d actually be really pretty if you lost a little weight.” I’ve already written my rant on that, so i’ll leave it short here. But i think i did fail to mention (being caught up in arguing) that she is really pretty, screw qualifiers. Also, Miss Avarice wrote what could easily be a response to that if it hadn’t been written about a week earlier.
Conclusion? Say what you want about me; don’t fuck with my friends! Also, don’t mind the ranting, i’m still in a pretty damn good mood.
“Hey Janeane” – The Hangdogs