“Right up to your room for a drink and travel scrabble”

Update part 3 – my second trip out of town was a conference for work.  Oh yes, i went on a business trip – i’m afraid that i might be a grown-up.  That aside, though, it was fantastic.  The person i went with was great – she’s kind of peripherally related to my work, not a co-worker, so i didn’t really know her before.  The topic was interesting, i learned a lot (as well as learning what it is i still need to learn – it’s nice to be pointed in the right direction sometimes).  I’m not going to get into the details of what it was, but i’m sure that it will play into and spark some of my future more intellectual/political posts.

It was also a lot of fun.  I met a lot of really cool people, stayed up way too late too many nights in a row drinking too much, playing cards and talking with said cool people.  I mean, networking.  Networking.  I think the social dynamics of things like conferences are really fascinating.  You throw like 100 people – some co-workers, some passing aquaintaces, some who see each other yearly at the particular event, a lot of strangers – onto a closed (or semi-closed) campus (hotel, conf. center, whatever) for like 3 days, and some clear groups and styles and divisions form, as well as an overall sense of community.  It almost seems like it ought to take longer than that, but i suppose even at home you generally decide very quickly whether you like someone’s company.  And in this case you don’t have time to have to deal with most of the complications, which makes everyone more likely to get along – i think.  I also think that a lot of people take this sort of thing as half work, half vacation.  That is to say that it is work, and what with computers you don’t really leave your other work at home, but you do get to leave a lot of your other responsibilities (like families) at home so you have more leeway to stay out late and stuff like that.

Most broadly, there seemed to be three groups as far as free time went – the older party crowd, the younger party crowd, and the people who slept.  There was plenty of overlap in all three, really, but that was kind of how it drifted.  I fell in with the older party crowd somehow.  I think it was the cards – i’m a sucker for card games.

And i, uh, slept with a guy.  I mean, not sex (’cause i am so totally not down with that), but basically sex.  I don’t even know where to start ’cause it was just weird.  Not bad, in fact overall good, but definitely very weird.  It was one of those things that “just kind of happened,” but, like all those things that “just happen,” there is a point beforehand that you totally see it coming and actually do get to choose to veer off or keep going.  To back up a bit, we met during hanging out-drinking-cards time the first night and totally hit it off.  Not like that, just in that “you’re a lot of fun” way that i hit it off with any number of people.  He had the cute-innocent-teddy-bear look.  And was a little bit of a jackass – not mean, just in that snide, funny, always has a comment way.  (i am a sucker for the ones who are kind of assholes)  And after a few drinks, i can snipe back with the best of them.  Anyhow, night two followed a similar hanging out-drinking-cards pattern.  And, again, i was among the last crowd up.  We all left the hang-out room, but somewhere before i made it to my sleeping-room, we decided (his suggestion) to sit up talking for longer.  This was probably the first hint of what might “happen.”  But, then, i’m kinda dense about this sort of thing (i’m getting better at it).  I’m also, i think, a kind of flirty person rather naturally if i think someone is cool (being drunk helps, of course).  Then there was the suggestion to go elsewhere – this was probably the point where it would have failed to “happen” if it were to (like, “it’s really late, maybe we should sleep, bye”).

But i didn’t say that, because i was having fun, and it did happen, and other than being weird on so many levels, it was good.  Like, for starters, i’m gay, and he knew that too.  And, really, i’m fine with that, but it is strange.  It was a work trip (that might be the only part of the whole thing that i actually feel awkward about).  He’s definitely older than me – i don’t know exactly, age never came up, maybe 40?  Maybe married.  Notably, this didn’t really come up either, but sometime in the previous day or so there was one comment where i think someone said so (you know, it just occurred to me that people wear wedding rings, and it was perhaps rather obvious, but i’m not very observant – i never notice that sort of thing).  I forgot how scratchy clean-shaven guys are.  And i do still think real cock is kinda icky.  But it was fun, and he was considerate.  He said at some point “i don’t want to do anything you don’t want to do.”  We both laughed, because, of course, he did want to.  But he meant “won’t”.  We saw each other the next day and had a “so, umm, well…yeah…” conversation.  Partly because we’d gotten about 3 hours of sleep.  We did clarify that we both agreed that it was really weird – not bad, pretty good, but definitely weird.  It’s really nice to know that both people feel, more or less, the same about it afterwards, so that was good.

Yup.  That’s the story of my crazy trip.  Also, travelling and airports suck.

Lady Brett
“Conventioneers” – Barenaked Ladies