“I say high, and you say low”
I’ve never been very good with labels. I’m not even that attached to my name. That is not to say that i would ever consider changing it, or that i would ever introduce myself with something else. I wouldn’t; i love my name. It’s just to say that i don’t really care what you call me, so long as i know you’re talking to me.
So, am i gay, queer, lesbian, a dyke, or what? Any of the above. I don’t give a shit. I generally use queer if i’m talking about a lot of people, or “the community” because it’s inclusive, simple, and just what i’m used to because of my age. For self-reference i don’t use any of them often.
I think lesbian is a bit clunky, linguistically, but i use it because it is the most straightforward thing to say to people who are not well versed in the whole gay thing. I like gay because it’s simple. I like the fact that dyke brings to mind all sorts of stereotypes. That makes it really handy for humor, and just a little bit more weighty than the other terms.
But mostly i just talk about my girlfriend. It’s pretty obvious at that point (or you can always ask “girlfriend or girlfriend?”), and i think it’s the most accurate thing i can say. Because i don’t have sex with “women” or with “men” in general, i have sex with her.
Yes, okay, if i weren’t with her i would have sex with othe people, and they would probably be women, and i guess that’s what i mean when i say i’m gay. I’m a bit wishy-washy on the subject, which is the way i like it. I’m not inclined to sign onto any contracts on who i’m allowed to go weak in the knees for based on general characteristics.
Even if there are some things that pretty consistently work on me.
“Hello, Goodbye” – The Beatles